Age differences and quarter-life crises

Jake and I have started watching The Millionaire Matchmaker on Bravo (all his fault), and today over poached eggs and chocolate pancakes we were discussing the age differences in the show. Of course some of these rich older dudes are looking for 20-something blondies, and it's so obvious that they will not be happy together in the long run.... not BECAUSE of their age difference, but because the attributes they prize are so shallow.

I've been thinking about age differences lately. My husband is one of the ten million February birthdays among the people I know, and he just turned 35 last week. Our 8 years & 3 months age difference is pretty awesome actually. When we first started going out, he was 26 and I was 18 (!) and we were actually in a similar place at the time: broke and crazy, as he had quit his teaching job to take a stab at playing guitar full-time, and I had moved away from home for the first time and started college in NYC. Now that I look back on this, I was in the first of three phases of the quarter-life crisis (newfound freedom, approx. 18-22), and he was in the second phase (figuring out your place in the real world, approx. 23-27).

Now I feel like I'M in that second phase as I try to figure out what the #@*& I'm doing, and he's already past the final third phase (getting it together and starting to see success, approx. 28-32). I can't even imagine what it would be like to go through this transitionary phase without support. If we were both in crazy, inner-turmoil, changing-every-day life stages it could be really tough, so I'm happy we have the age difference that we do and that Jake is so content with where he is right now.

My husband really is one of my biggest inspirations and I aspire to someday have the level of contentment that he does. He is thrilled to play guitar and make music for a living, and he often gives thanks for the ability to do so. And he tells me frequently how lucky he feels to be happily married and living in a nice apartment in NYC. For some weird reason he says he didn't expect those things to happen for him. He just has a really good attitude of gratitude (wow, now there's a phrase I should trademark and write a book about and then be on Oprah....).

And of course I love the story of how he got here, quitting a teaching job that was stable and cushy but not the right fit for him, and moving with me into the teeniest apartment of all time so he could live in the City and pursue a professional music career. I hope that someday I can trace some success back to this weird moment in my life as I leave the safety of my old job and reach out for something else....