Lately I've been thinking a lot about people who really "give their all" to their work. That 110% that people speak of -- a concept that both stresses me out and doesn't seem mathematically possible. I've always seen myself as someone who gives my all, and I certainly tell that story to myself, but do I really? If so, why do I accomplish so little?
I was just watching Oprah and she interviewed people with "dream jobs" such as florist to the stars and celebrity cake chef. Not my idea of a dream job, but I understand that people admire the creativity and autonomy that those positions offer. The first woman interviewed was the executive creative director for J Crew, and her cliched but true job tip was to do what you love and give 110%.
I think I gave 90-100% in my favorite position at my old company, but if I critique myself honestly, I didn't put quite as much of myself into the last position I filled there. I always say that last job wasn't a good fit for me (and objectively it wasn't -- my bosses, colleagues, friends, and an alumni career counselor all agreed), but would it have been at all different if I had given more, if I wanted to, or had to? But I wanted to do something else. So I am. But am I giving this 110%? I don't know, but I really, really want to.
I'm surrounded by the success stories of the people who fought hard for what they wanted. I'm 3/4 of the way done with the Moss Hart memoir Act One I previously mentioned, and I am so impressed by the persistence and dedication of the young Moss. Of course, professional theatre in the 1920s and early '30s was a very different world in many ways, with plays usually financed by one producer, cast and rehearsed in only a few weeks, etc. but there are some details that are so similar it could have been written yesterday. For instance, he gathers frequently for coffee with his young peers who also want to take the theatre by storm, and their frustrations seem to mirror the ones my friends and I have.
Anyway, I've been thinking about Moss Hart daily as I finish his book. And I can't help but notice all these young super-achievers in today's culture. Lady Gaga. Kat von D on LA Ink. Even the younger generation of musical theatre writers who are around my age but actually well-known in the theatre community. My age and younger! Oh man, I am freaking out about turning 27 with so little to show for my years so far.... (Note: this is not a passive aggressive wish for people to leave comments saying I have accomplished things.)
And I've been thinking about Madonna lately too, not only because the "Power of Madonna" Glee episode this week was AMAZING. I really do look up to her as a woman who kicks ass, does it her way, doesn't apologize, and doesn't become irrelevant with age. I re-watched the Truth or Dare movie the other night and I just get a kick out of watching her be bitchy and beautiful and demanding and driven. (This is getting too long to write more about Madonna at the moment, but I may tomorrow because I may have more to say!)
Anyway, I'm thinking about what it means to be truly driven. I really want to be, and I'm willing to take that hard look at myself to figure out what's working and what's not. This isn't high school anymore, where that 89.5% average got rounded up to an A and everyone was happy. It seems 89.5% isn't good enough when I'm competing with 110%. I actually used to be very proud of those 89.5's actually, because it meant I could get by with the minimal effort necessary to still get an A, and knowing I didn't waste a bit of my energy was kind of thrilling. When I had a good average going, I would figure out how low I could possibly score on the final exam and still get an A average for the class. And in college I certainly honed my system of knowing exactly how much effort I wanted to put in for which grade. It was all kind of a breeze really, and I feel like I've never really been challenged until now, as I'm trying to make my own path and be a success in a city and industry full of talented type-A perfectionists.
So now I really have to unlearn my laziness, kick my own ass, and figure out if 110% is really possible.
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Some thoughts, Janine. Not sure if they make sense outside my head, but let's see. :)
ReplyDelete110% seems nebulous to me too, since, like you said, it's a technical impossibility. I think it's great if it means "work efficiently and to the fullest extent of your passion" but I think it's terrible when it means "work until you barf and pass out from stress, lack of sleep, and neuroticism." I have a feeling that the people who are both successful and happy/healthy are the ones who are clever. As a matter of fact, I would wager that 70% + shrewdness is usually better than 110%.
Thanks for the thoughts Tania! Totally get what you're saying.
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